My Wake Up Call
My Wake Up Call happened after a series of events–I think. I was in the Upside Down as they call it on Stranger Things. It was a whole season and a brief moment. I was in and out of it with no control of where I was going to wake up. I hit snooze. That’s what I do. I liked to think of the alarm as a guideline–a suggestion. If you know me, you know I like to figure things out on my own. I frequently buck the trends. Getting out of bed in the morning was something I needed to figure out for a looooong time. It’s also not a trend–I assumed it was since everyone always talks about it. My bad.
Every self-help book I’ve read for the past decade or more has suggested a morning routine–something people are excited to get out of bed for in the morning! Um, what?! Who is hopping out of bed in the morning? Apparently, a lot of people–just not me.
I remember reading 7 Habits of Highly Effective People when I graduated from high school. It was a graduation gift from the school superintendent. She even wrote me a nice note in it. I also received Oh the Places You’ll Go! by the infamous Dr. Seuss from my cousin. Books are great graduation gifts–I hope that tradition is continuing. In recent years, I’ve read every book by Mel Robbins, Atomic Habits, and continue to read almost every popular self-help book. They all mentioned how important a morning routine is. I still couldn’t get out of bed.
When the pandemic hit and I was teaching virtually, I remember calling my friend Kristy and asking her for suggestions for working from home. Kristy gives great advice and she hasn’t steered me in the wrong direction ever and I knew she wouldn’t with this dilemma. Do you know what Kristy told me? “You should have a morning routine in place.” *sigh*
A meeting (several meetings, actually) with the iconic Maegan Tomela Burke, and support from Adrienne, Ashley, Desiree, Denzel, and Mel, helped me realize that the problem is me. No, they didn’t tell me that I am the problem. They guided me to growth by finding a solution to my problem in which I realized were my choices. I am choosing not to get out of bed. It’s not that I don’t want to–I love my life. It’s that I like sleeping and snuggling. My bedroom is incredible with the lighting, the smells, the books, journals, and every little thing to make it a peaceful sanctuary (all the tips from self-help books). Aside from food, I’ve got everything I need in that space, why leave it?
Because the alternative feels better. That’s my why. The first morning in February, when I hopped out of bed when the alarm went off, was such an incredible experience. Just kidding, it was annoying and I was annoyed that I was even trying a new morning routine again. I’m going to fail at this and be down on myself–again! were my exact thoughts. But I did it anyway. I had a few sips of water, threw on my winter clothes (yes, February mornings in northern Minnesota have temps that are below zero), and went outside with the dogs.
It was magical! Just kidding, it was freezing and ten minutes felt like an eternity. I had the least supportive bra on and didn’t want to move but I knew the only way to actually wake up and follow through was to move. So I paced back and forth on my sidewalk. I paced and I talked to the dogs, and I listened to the occasional owl and coyote. I’d like to tell you that this moment changed everything. It didn’t. I was jealous of both dogs–one immediately ran back inside for a morning treat from my husband and the other ran around and played in the snow as if this was the best day ever. She was pretty cute and it distracted me and motivated me for the rest of the time.
Actually, it didn’t. It lasted about thirty seconds and I continued to check my watch every ninety seconds to see when I could go inside. The last 15 seconds I wasn’t moving. I was standing at the door counting down the seconds until I could step inside. I felt so good going in and sipping my hot coffee. I’m such a bad ass I thought to myself as I watched my husband eat a delicious breakfast sandwich that he had plenty of time to make for himself because he gets up when his alarm goes off. I even said, out loud, how awesome I am and through a mouthful of cheese and eggs, he agreed.
The next morning, I got up and did it again, and it felt great. Just kidding, I was annoyed at the moment but felt like I was the hardest working person on earth as I sipped my hot coffee and took off my wool coat, wool socks, and wool mittens. My Wake Up Call is now a part of my identity–something that I denied I needed my whole life. It didn’t happen overnight because of all the great choices I made. It happened in all the small moments of failure and reflection.
